


more than that

by calangkoh



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: CONNVERSE-ation piece HAHA, Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, connie saved stevens life and steven has shit to say, platonic i love yous or romantic declarations? you pick., short conversation piece
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-30
Updated: 2019-01-30
Packaged: 2019-10-19 05:51:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17595662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calangkoh/pseuds/calangkoh
Summary: i saw a su crit blog say steven doesnt deserve connie and honestly...fair. but you dont think steven KNOWS that?((does ANYONE deserve connie???))or: steven tells connie something important





	more than that

The moments spanning from White Diamond’s fingernails gripping around his gem to being in the arms of its personification were blurry. Steven’s most detailed memories of the experience would always be  _ Pain. Dying. Connie. Pain. Joy.  _

 

Connie would recount the scene in excruciating detail to him multiple times throughout their lives (talking out their traumas was something they did) but all Steven would ever be able to remember was that simple sequence.

 

“You really don’t remember?” Connie asked, near tears. 

 

“No, I...I really don’t. I’m sorry.” 

 

“ _ Steven _ , you were  _ dying _ ! I remember it like,” Connie clutched her shirt and her voice dropped, “like it’s happening  _ right now _ .”

 

Steven threw his ukulele to the side and pulled Connie into a hug. 

 

“But it’s not happening right now! That was weeks ago! Everything is fine.  _ I’m _ fine!”

 

Connie ducked her head and started to cry. Her words came out between choked breaths. 

 

“But...I don’t  _ understand _ how you don’t remember. I’ve been thinking about it nonstop. But thinking about it doesn’t make me feel better! It just makes me feel like it’s happening  _ again _ ! How do you  _ forget _ ? Why can’t  _ I  _ forget?” 

 

Steven felt tears prickle his own eyes and he pulled her tighter until she turned to hug him back and cry into his shoulder.

 

“I wish I could remember, so you don’t have to be alone.”

 

A laugh burst out in between sobs. 

 

“No you don’t. I don’t want you to remember it. You were in a lotta pain.” 

 

Steven rubbed her back and waited for her to tire out. As her gasps slowed and the tension eased from her shoulders, he took a deep breath.

 

“I remember you.”

 

Connie parted and wiped her eyes, “What?” 

 

“I don’t remember what happened besides a few vague feelings. I don’t even remember the pain itself, just that there  _ was _ pain, you know? I mean, with what you told me it’s probably a good thing it’s all a blur, but I feel bad that you have this memory all by yourself and that I scared you so much and can’t even remember it!” Steven threw his arms out in emphasis. “But I remember you, Connie. I definitely remember you.”

 

“You do? Really? You’re not just lying to make me feel better, are you?” 

 

“No way,” Steven assured. “Okay, so I was dying. I know that. I can’t remember specifically but I know it was happening. But I remember you  _ saving my life _ , Connie.”

 

The thought had crossed his mind multiple times over the past few weeks, but only now when the event was out in the open for discussion did the weight of the realization hit him. 

 

“Connie,” he repeated. “You saved my life.”

 

Connie blushed. “I really didn’t do much. It was mostly you. I just saved pink you the extra steps.”

 

Steven shook his head, “You did more than that.” 

 

“What do you mean?”

 

It was Steven’s turn to blush. There was a lot he meant by that statement, but he went with the superficial answer first.

 

“I wouldn’t have made it. Okay, yeah I don’t remember much, but I do know that. Human me would’ve died trying to get to pink me. While all that death ray and level-nine-thousand-shield stuff was going on, human me would’ve worn himself out dragging himself across the floor. Pink me would’ve been too late, and then who knows what would’ve happened then,” he ignored the dozens of implications and continued with a grin spread across his face, “You swooped in like the awesome heroine you always are and said ‘I gotchu!’ because you’re Connie Maheswaran! The best friend in the entire world!  _ My  _ best friend in the entire world! You’re always there for me!” 

 

Connie laughed and fiddled with her thumbs, still sniffling sporadically. Steven watched her brown eyes look intensely at her shoelaces. His grin softened and he nervously mimicked her position, choosing to fiddle with his own thumbs as well. 

 

“But you did more than that,” he said.

 

Connie lifted her head and stared inquisitively. It made Steven’s cheeks feel hot at what he was about to tell her. 

 

“Connie, my whole life I’ve had to convince people that I’m me, not my mom, to the point where I even had to convince myself because I started doubting it. People have always projected their grief over her onto me in some way, and I don’t blame anyone because they lost someone they loved, but it was still something I had to deal with. But with you,” Steven felt brave enough to make eye contact with her, “I never had to be anyone else but myself. I never had to convince you of anything. You always accepted who I am. It seems like a small thing, but you have no idea how important that was, and is. You’re the one person who I feel most myself around, and if I didn’t have you as a friend, I don’t think anything would’ve worked out the way it has. I’d still be trying to be someone I’m not, and I never would’ve felt as at peace with myself as I do now without your support.”

 

“So, when I say ‘you did more than walk me a few extra steps,’ I mean it.” 

 

Connie burst out into tears again. 

 

“Oh no, did I say something wro—“

 

“No!” Connie laughed. “No! You said the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard and I think I need some crackers for all this cheese!” 

 

“I’m a cheesy guy, we’ve established this!” 

 

“I’m more of a jam girl, myself.” 

 

They laughed and melted into a hug. 

 

“Thank you for telling me,” Connie whispered. 

 

“I love you.” 

 

“I love you, too.”

  
  
  
  
  



End file.
